Infidelity Investigations – Is your spouse cheating on you?
There are many reasons people hire Private Investigators to help determine if their spouse is being unfaithful. For some people they want documented evidence of the activity because they are preparing to file for divorce/child custody with the courts. For others, they just want peace of mind. Maybe they have been married for many years and still love the person. Deep down they think if they confront their spouse with this evidence, they can still possibly still work through the issues and make the relationship work. However, most clients just want to know the truth so they can move on with their lives.
A typical call I receive from a client usually involves initially speaking with them about why they believe their spouse is being unfaithful. I usually hear things like “my spouse is very secretive with his or her cell phone” or “my spouse is acting different lately” or “my spouse is suddenly leaving for work earlier or coming home later than usual”. These can be “red flags” of a change of lifestyle with your spouse, but these reasons alone are not proof of infidelity. I have listed below certain activities to be aware of that may, and I emphasize may, indicate possible infidelity.
- Sudden change of behavior/schedule – Leaving at unusual times or more frequently with no warning
- Odor of cologne or perfume on your spouse
- Sudden change of appearance or grooming standards
- A sudden interest in physical fitness
- Disinterest in sex with you
- A request for sexual activity out of the norm
- Excessive activity on social media or texting – new female/male “friends”
- Secretive with cell phone – wont share passwords
- Unusual applications on cell phone – commonly downloaded to hide other information
- Evidence of infidelity on cell phone/computer – text messages/emails/explicit photos etc.
- Unusual phone numbers on cell phone statement
- Overcompensating behavior/ compliments/ gifts to you – Distraction from unfaithful behavior
- Evidence of online dating sites
- Witnesses that have seen your spouse out with another person
- Found birth control in your spouse’s control
- Unusual charges on credit/ATM cards or unusual amounts of cash taken out of account
- Spouse “cleans their tail”- This means after they are on their cell phone or computer, they immediately delete their history to erase their trail.
These type of investigations usually require surveillance on the suspected spouse. It greatly assists the investigator if you have specific time frames when you believe the activity may be occurring. This not only helps the investigator to obtain good evidence, but can also significantly reduce the cost of the investigation. However, it is understood that this is not always possible. Prior to contacting an investigator, document any evidence you already have. In addition, be prepared to give the investigator all personal information about your spouse, including his or her physical description, friends, vehicles, place of employment, habits, and weekly schedule. With this information the investigator will be able to better narrow down a time frame that will increase the chances of obtaining the evidence you are seeking.